How to scare customers

I don’t generally write blogs about companies and their marketing failures. Except this time. Last night, around 7pm, there’s a knock at the side door. Not the front door, lit up like it’s Xmas, no the dark door leading out of the kitchen. Also, I’m alone in a large, luxury mansion that I’m looking after while the owners are in Mexico.

Knock knock; who could this possibly be? This house is in Victoria, in a high end neighbourhood where burglaries have been known to happen. Knock knock. I open the door to a young man, tall and handsome, well dressed. He is smiling in what seems to me a sinister fashion.

Who are you? I bark. He keeps smiling at me.

I am wondering if you would like to switch your internet account to Telus, he inquires, all sweetness and light.

What, at 7pm in the evening? No, never. Get out of here!

I slam the door. I hear him shouting back: I am only doing my job!!!

What is this, has the Depression era with its desperate door to door salesman just been resurrected?

I call the police. They call back and inform me that, yes indeed, he was a Telus salesman, going door to door to try and sign people up or change their carrier.

The ladies in my aquafit class all agree with me: this should not be happening, certainly not at night and at a dark, unlit side door.

Telus is crazy, they say, as one.

I say, Telus Marketing sucks. Nobody has ever done any market research at that company, or they would know better than to scare old ladies to death.

Take note, and take that, Telus.


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