Dear Santa Claus,

rumour has it that in spite of Political Correctness, you are still around and rewarding the good with goodies. I have been ever so good this year, so hear my list, dear white bearded one.

First, make people smarter. I mean, we have so many tricky issues to confront–Climate Chaos, Shocking Income Inequailties, Corruption, to name just the obvious ones–so we need all the smarts we can get.

Second, let’s vote in a coalition government. You know, one where we get the good looking visage of Trudeau hitched to the intellect of Mulcair and together, they have no choice but to serve US, the beleaguered Canadian public. With Ms May adding inspired rhetoric, as needed.

Third, let’s be brave. By that I mean, let’s refuse to be bullied by official fear mongering of all stripes, but especially the kind that leads to wars in far away places, and the suppression of Truth everywhere.

Finally, could you include a huge, hilarious, truly gigantic sense of the ridiculous leading to howls of sustained laughter. Give us the courage to laugh at our follies, especially the so called Elites. If we can’t fight em, we can, at the very least, laugh them out of the building. Before it comes crashing down.

So, to summarize: more brains, better government, more balls, and plenty of laughs. That’s what I want, not just for Christmas, but for all of 2015 and forever after.

If you can deliver on that, dear Santa, I swear, I will never ask for another thing, ever.

Yours faithfully,

the old bag in winter.